I Forgive, but NOT FORGET

Okay readers, so I've been flooded with emails from all about the ending of my last post concerning my "forgiving" Jordan "ex-fiance for his transgressions.  Let me explain something ... when I say I forgive him it's not to mean that I'm taking him back.  Those of you who know me know that I"m a stronger person than that.  What I mean is that I'm letting go of the hurt and trying not to dwell any longer.  I'm letting go of that and of him.   Like many of you have expressed, I do deserve better and am excited to know that my "special someone" is still out there looking for me.  For whatever reason I'm going through this I feel I will come out stronger and a better person on the other end.  I"m thrilled about that envitibility!

To forgive all DOES NOT mean that I approve of what's happen and what he did to me.  I'm simply letting go and letting God deal with him.  Unfortunately for me, since this has come out I've been messaged by not only friends of Jordan's but some of his ex woman also revealing other transgressions.  For example,  I've been told that Jordan propositioned an ex of one of his really good friends during Halloween... of course this proposition came after Jordan had proposed to me.  I'm in disbelief!  It's incredibly surreal.  This proposition included, "I've always been attracted to you and I'd love to get together for a Halloween party".  Luckily this girl had enough sense to turn Jordan down.  I've talked with this girl and she confirms everything.

If there was any hope, at all, in my mind that maybe Jordan and I could work things out it's all gone.  Too many stories have been told and confirmed for me to even consider something like that.  Sure I still have love for him however it's fleeting.

One of Jordan's really good "girl - friends" sent me a Facebook message the other asking if I feel if I"m  getting what I deserve?  For those of you reading this, if you'll look back to some of my earlier posts you'll find that I started this blog because I'm going through a transition in my romantic life - a true redemption.  Yes it's true that I cheated on all other S.O.'s in my life however the difference between my situations and what Jordan did to me is I told the truth and was upfront.  So Brooke, in some way yes, I do feel like I may be getting what I deserve. However, Jordan will to.

Here I thought after being proposed to by Jordan that he'd given me my redemption, but I see my redemption has come now.  Hopefully my slate is wiped clean.  Going through this time I'm a better person and will be the best S.O. to whomever my husband/boyfriend will be!  And that's redemption.

Those of you who may have not seen this video please check it out and send to all you know: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyWcXCHchCM

The Whole Truth and Nothing but ...

Here's the deal ... about a week ago I caught my ex-fiance cheating on me and that hurts, but nothing hurt more than to be lied to about it.  Days and hours leading up to me posting this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyWcXCHchCM  on YouTube I begged and pleaded with my fiance to tell me the truth, he didn't.  I practically all but told him that I knew what was going on, but he, as most of you know, insisted on his innocence.

That's why I posted the video.  A lot of people have asked me why I would post something so personal and well the answer is .... because apparently that's the only way anyone gets the truth.  Look at current events and celebrity news, Tiger Woods, former President Bill Clinton, Kobe Bryant all these men most likely denied the truth until a nationwide spotlight was shined on their transgression.  It's then and only then are they willing to come forth with the truth and feel any kind of remorse.  Why put yourself in the that position??  Why take it to that level. 

Have mainstream media and celebrities really gone that far in our lives?  Do we really put them on that high of a pedastal that not only are they influencing how we talk, dress, etc., but now they have an effect on our relationships?  That's pretty incredible if you ask me.

I posted my very personal video on Wednesday November 25 and it wasn't until that next Sunday that I was told the truth about what really happened.  What did he say?  Well and the quick and dirty of it, no pun intended, is he indeed went out of our relationship and had sex with this other woman, it wasn't just kissing.  When asked why he didn't stop all the cheating and inappropriate emailing he simply said, "I'm sorry, I don't know why.  It was all just a game.  I didn't and never wanted her; you're the one I love".

After only a few days of being posted on YouTube my, "Honeymoon is Over" video received 700 hits and while I appreciate everyone's support and love that's not why I posted.  I needed and deserved the truth and he really made me go to that level.

My truth?  Well, I still love him.  I'd love nothing more than for him to get help for this problem he has with going outside of his relationships.  Would I ever get back with him?  I don't know.  I've told him that he'd have a lot of people to make good with including me before something like that were to happen.  I asked and he agreed to counseling which is a good thing.  I guess time will only tell.  My next step is Forgiveness.

And I do forgive him.

My Wedding Plan Put on Cruise Control

Now that I'm engaged and Jordan has granted me the ultimate Romantic Redemption I've thrown myself into a wedding planning frenzy. First thing I've notice --- WEDDINGS ARE EXPENSIVE!!! Yikes! At this point, I think everyone who isn't in the wedding industry is in the WRONG business. WOW! So much money thrown around.


I've been going around Dallas trying to find the best venue for my, I mean OUR, big day (NO BRIDEZILLA HERE) and the costs are incredible. The average price for a particular venue is right at $8,000 and that's if you plan on a Sunday. Saturday weddings are upwards of $11 - $15,000 and that's not including the DJ, cake, lighting, flowers and all the other extras. Whew!

So, my momma comes into town (Dallas) to tour a couple of venues that I just LOVE - the Warwick off Oak Lawn, the Mansion on Turtle Creek, Hotel ZaZa and the Fairmount Hotel. I totally fell for the Fairmount - absolutely loved it. Rooftop pool area where I could have my ceremony and fabulous reception room. That was the place, that was it!

After we toured the Fairmount and settled on that venue, mom, dad, me and jordan went to have a couple drinks at Humperdinks in Arlington. And that's where it happened ....

Mom turns to me and says, "Let's scrap the whole wedding thing and I'll pay for your entire wedding party to go on a cruise and we'll have a ceremony on the ship."

Now, if you're reading this I'm guessing your giving your best, "Wow" or "What!" face, right?? Probably the same exact face I gave me mother when she said that. So now I"m faced with the decision to either do the traditional wedding day complete with ceremony and reception OR go on a 7-day Mexican Riveira cruise with all my best friends. WHAT WOULD YOU DO???


RoMANce is in the air, SO TAKE IT IN!!!

Surprise! I'm ENGAGED!!!! The rest of the story ...

Yes, it's true I'm engaged!!!  Thanks to all of you friends who've watched and commented on my YouTube channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/dzgirl15

But here's maybe what you didn't know ...  Jordan actually started planning the whole thing back in August with the help of a mutal friend, Jeff Crilley (Thanks Jeff!).  Jeff provided us with a contact, Paige Smith, at Good Morning Texas.  However, he gave us this contact to help get our business, Surprise! You're Engaged some publicity. 

Right away, I started trying to get a hold of Paige so we could do an interview.  I must have emailed at least 10 times between August and Oct. 13 - nothing, not one email was returned.  It mad me furious!  Then, Oct. 8, Jordan calls me and says to call Paige because she had just called and wanted to set up an interview.  FINALLY!!!

My mind was totally in "Biz mode" the day of the interview that I had no clue that Jordan was going to "pop the question".  That's why you see a very surprised look on my face in the video.  After the show I started asking Jordan the following questions:

When did you start planning this?  Back in August when we first met with Jeff.

Are you the reason why Paige never emailed me back?  yes, everytime you emailed her, she would forward it to me.  She didn't get back to you because I asked her not to so we could plan this without word getting out.

When did you get the ring?  I went shopping for it two months ago and picked it up 3 days before the show.

Who all knew? Everyone in the studio knew what was going on except for you.  The anchors, the other guests, the camera men, everyone.  They brought in the celebrity wedding planner, flowers and bridal gowns in just for you.


I couldn't believe his answers.  He did VERY GOOD.  Not only did I get a ring, but he managed to promote the business in the process, incredible!  Plus, and most importantly, Jordan had to get over a fear to make this happen.  For those of you who know Jordan, you know that he's not the showy type.  He doesn't do on-camera stuff often.  In fact, the days leading up to the show he couldn't  sleep; he'd wake up at 4a.m. and stay up until work at 8a.m.  That's why this proposal means so much.

That's the thing about proposals guys, you have to tailor them to the lady in your life.  Think about who she is, what she likes, special moments the two of you have shared, things like that.  Then plan a proposal.  Spur-of-the-moment type of proposals should not be an option.  If you need help, call on us Surprise! You're Engaged and we can help plan and videotape the whole thing.

Now, that I'm engaged I know what my clients feel like and how special that time is.  The best part, I have the moment on DVD and it's now my most prized possession.  I'll never forget this moment.  Thank you so much Jordan for picking me!

Love is in the air, SO TAKE IT IN!!!

Are Wedding Proposals Dead?

If you ask me, I'd say absolutely not however, I do think some men have become lazy when it comes to this life-altering moment in time.  And Hollywood is no help:  On the season finale of “Entourage” this week, one of the characters proposes to his girlfriend only there was no grand gesture, no, instead it was more a spur-of-the-moment declaration of his commitment.  Unfortunately, that's how some engagements have gone.  Instead of taking the time to really think and plan something for your lady, some men opt for the spur of the moment thing: 
1.  The wake up in the morning and propose only works if you plan and prepare a nice breakfast
2.  The romantic dinner proposal only works if you opt for champagne and prepare an out-of-this-world speech
3.  The 'at-home' proposal only works if you go all out and light candles have music maybe prepare dinner, you know what I mean.

And of course every proposal would be better ehanced by hiring Surprise! You're Engaged (me) to professionally videotape the whole thing!

Getting back to the point, guys you have to get with it.  The proposal is 100% you and your reflection of your relationship.  A man in love is going to take time and really think about a good proposal and plan one around his woman; what she likes, what she would be impressed by.  He knows his lady.

Take for instance my S.O. - a good man - he knows that I"m the type of lady who is going to want the world to know when he proposes.  He knows I'd want my mom and dad there, as many friends as he can get and I'll want it videotaped to post on my YouTube channel.  He jokes with me sometimes saying the perfect proposal for me would be during the next opening of the Olympic games; he would have to be the once carrying the torch and before lighting the flame he'd ask me to marry him this way the whole world would be watching.  haha! 

Some ladies aren't like me.  They are more of the "just you and me" keep it quiet type of proposal.  A romantic get-a-way with no one around or romantic dinner in a dimly lit Italian cafe.  Bottomline, know your lady and know what type of proposal she'd want.

One thing for sure, that both types of ladies would hate, is the spur-of-the-moment proposal.  Guys, don't ask during a heated argument just to get her to "be quiet" that kind of proposal would rob us ladies of the grand proposal women dream of. 


An official proposal  is the act that seals the deal— even if we’ve already decided to marry our respective partners.  There's something about a lackluster proposal that just seems incomplete.  Plus, it's a horrible way to start the martial part of the relationship, AND there's no great story when the eventual question comes to pass, "How did he do it?"  Don't rob us of that glory, guys!  Come on!

Take ownership, guys!  The proposal again, is 100% all you.  Take the lead and run with it.  Use up all your creative juices.  Keep in mind, the proposal is the memory your lady will always cherish and one that people will always ask about. 

Now, I'm sure those of you reading this who didn't get the kind of proposal you dreamed of don't feel any less married, but I'm sure it's something you wish you could do over.  Be honest.  For others, I imagine, a proposal is an unnecessary formality that’s easy to forgo. So, tell me, readers, what camp do you fall into? Is an official proposal something you feel you need? Do you want your man to ask for your father’s permission or blessing? Does he have to get down on one knee?

Also, don't forget about my business: Surprise! You're Engaged - we help PLAN and VIDEOTAPE wedding proposals.  It's all hidden camera work - she'll never know I'm there until she says YES!

Remember, LOVE is in the air, SO TAKE IT IN!!!

My Weekend Packed with Celebrities, Chicago, Notre Dame and LOVE!!!

My weekend, OMG!!!, I had a wonderful weekend!!!  My S.O. and I flew from Dallas to Chicago on Southwest (my perferred airline) for the Notre Dame football game on Oct. 3.  I use to do sideline reporting for the Irish in 2005 and 2006 so going back for home games has become somewhat of a new tradition.

Anyhow, the game was fantastic and tailgating was perfect!  I saw old friend from South Bend and Fort Wayne, IN; it was rainy and in the 50's (football weather); and the Irish won in overtime.  We had such a great time! 

For those who follow this blog, no I wasn't proposed to.  Though I did think we was going to ask me since we were on the Notre Dame campus with special friends - would have been a perfect time, but I would have expect it so I'm glad it didn't happen there.  : )

Anyhow, the next day we drove to Chicago to spend a romantic night together.  And boy was it romantic and special.  First, we stayed at the Hyatt Regency in downtown Chi-town near the "Magnificent Mile" - great room. 

Later that night we went to enjoy a comedy show at the legendary theater, "Second City" - a theater responsible for putting comedians like Joan Rivers, Mike Myers, Chris Farley and others on the map.  The show was fantastic and so hilarious! If you're ever in Chicago make sure to check out "Second City"!

After the show we hit up this little Italian restaurant in "old town" called, "Orso's".  The food was so incredible, OMG.  Definitely a place I would use for Surprise! You're Engaged.  I imagine they probably have several wedding proposals happen there. 

After dinner we decided to walk back to the hotel, 2miles and 10PM.  On our way we happened upon the Four Seasons Hotel - Chicago and guess who we saw getting out of this lavish SUV ....

Yup, that's the "Iron Man" himself - Cal Ripken Jr.  He was so cool too.  I asked for a picture and he sat his luggage down right away and obliged.  What a wonderful person.  Definitely in my top 5 Most Friendly Celebrity Encounters.  What a surreal moment!  Good times.

Our date night was capped off by all the great buildings and scenery we saw on our walk back to the hotel.  The next day we checked out Wrigley Field and ate at Harry Caray's.  My S.O. wanted to do a little shopping at Niketown so we went there and who did we run into .... Robbin Williams!  Couldn't not believe it.  He too was pleasant to chat with cool to be around.  Again, SURREAL!

What an incredible weekend and impressive weekend; I'm just so happy that I could share it with the love of my life.  He truly made it complete .... LOVE is in the Air, so TAKE IT IN!!!

Surprise! You're a Jerk

I just ran into one of the biggest jerks I've ever encountered - in my APARTMENT COMPLEX.  Now, we didn't make eye contact or even speak, but that's the problem!

Here's the scenario:  It's raining, I'm rushing outside to roll up my windows.  Realizing that I"m still in the process of moving into this apartment complex, I get some hangers and cleaning stuff that were left in the car.  To be exact, I problem had in my hands about 30 hangers a broom and a swifter swiff-jet (love that thing!).  As I walk a couple of steps toward the stairs I find it's very difficult to carry all that as I'm dropping hangers and the broom.

At about the same time, a lady pulled up in the parking spot next to me, a handicap spot - she's not handicap, and I know she sees me struggling to get my stuff to the stairs.  Instead of offering help, she briskly walks away.  Once I open the door that leads to the stairs, still struggling I might add, I see her opening the door on the other side (there are 2 doors that lead to the same set of stairs). 

Alas, I second opportunity to right her wrong from only seconds ago and what does she do?  Puts down her head and without a word spoken walks up the stairs as if I didn't exist or need help.  Who doesn't offer to help another person in trouble?  Grant it, I'm not dying or anything however, it's about respect and character.  Who does that?

I'll tell you who does that ... a person who does NOT know LOVE.  Someone who doesn't have love or romance in their life.  Someone or even doesn't SHOW love or romance in their life.  Stay with me on this because I feel there is a direct correlation between Love/Romance and Kindness/Courtesy.   

Here are some simple definitions:
"Love": a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person
"Romance": (verb) - a. to court or woo romantically; treat with ardor or chivalrousness: 
"Courtesy": excellence of manners or social conduct; polite behavior, a courteous, respectful, or considerate act or expression
"Kindness": of a good or benevolent nature or disposition, as a person: a kind and loving person.


"To make friends, you have to be a friend"?  "Love breeds love?"  "Be KIND to others?"  Where do you think all those lessons came from?  Most likely your parents.  And I'm sure they didn't teach you to be selective in who you practice those lessons with, right?
 
I know how to Love and be Loved because of my parents - they showed me love, they showed me all the above words.  Therefore, I express myself  to everyone in a loving, romantic, courteous, kind way.  If I see someone struggling, I help them out.  If I see someone who looks like they've had a bad day, I ask if they're okay.  I'm the one person you'll see saying hi to everyone; I don't discriminate; I don't segregate anyone from my kindess and love.  Why shield that part of you?  It's so beautiful and contagious.
 
We were all born out of love.  Once born our parents made sure to show us love and teach us kindness and courtesy for others.  Overtime, we develop our own sense of romanticism. 
 
I honestly believe that the girl from the story above doesn't have love in her life.  Whether someone isn't showing it to her or she isn't showing it herself.  When people are in love and romantic, they are happy and want to make others happy, not just their parents or significant others. 


Like I've said before, I started my business, Surprise! You're Engaged because I found love and fell in love with the act of love and romance.  If love breeds love, then I feel it can breed kindness and courtesy and if that's true .... let's get to breeding!

Wedding Proposal: TAKE IT SERIOUSLY!

I've never really been too passionate about love until I found love.  Now, I'm "ga-ga" about the whole "yucky love stuff".  Especially when it comes to the wedding proposal.  We all know it's an important moment in a lifetime yet, it gets lost in the wedding world, despite it kicking off the entire wedding extravaganza.

That's why I started my business, Surprise! You're Engaged (http://www.surpriseyouareengaged.com/) - I plan and videotape wedding proposals and from what I know, I"m the only one in Texas and probably America who does so.  Yea, there are plenty of wedding videographers and wedding planners, but none who concentrate specifically on the proposal.

I love the planning process, I love the videotaping; and let's not forget I edit the video.  Just check out some of my videos:  www.youtube.com/user/dzgirl15

The way I see it, the wedding proposal is more real and raw than is the wedding itself.  The wedding is about production and rehearsals and timed events, not the proposal.  The proposal is probably the only event in the marriage or relationship that a MAN has total creative control over.  It's his "loveletter" to his lady acted out.  It's a serious moment between the two lovers and I think it should be commemorated much like the wedding is.

So men, take it seriously.  If you need help, let me help guide you or give you ideas. 
Couple of Tips:
1.  Plan a proposal around your lady
2.  Really think about who she is and who ya'll are as a couple
3.  Take time to think about what you're going to say when you ask
4.  Videotape the whole thing.  Whether you use my services or not - document your proposal because after about a year or so people forget what was said or promised.  It's also a great video to look back on, especially during hard times.

And that's your RoMANtic Redemption - remember Love is in the Air, SO TAKE IT IN!!!

Lucky in Love!!!

Alright guys, I'm gonna make this short and sweet and to the point.  I'm in love with my best friend, Jordan Gray, the S.O.!!!  For some of you who have been following my blog thus far, this may be a little confusing, but I've said GOODBYE to the CCG.  Thanks to my parents who came to visit me and their wise words and prayers from everyone, I've been set straight.

I'm so incredible happy with Jordan and I love him dearly.  For so many reason that I cannot explain however, I will say this, I learned something from this muddied time in my romantic life.....

Ladies, if you have a guy who puts you above everyone else, who does everything for you, treats you like a princess, is a Mr. Fix-it, comes to your aide anytime you're ready to quit and loves you unconditionally - NEVER LET HIM GO.  Fight back ur wandering eyes or ur curiosity for something "new" and "different". 

It's weird, but this confusing time has actually brought Jordan and I closer and to a new understanding in our relationship.  He's the one for me and I for him.  So Jordan, remember this moment because it's the beginning of ALWAYS!!!!  I LOVE YOU.

**** Alright everyone, I need ur help, well Jordan does actually.  He needs ur ideas for proposing to me.  Since we own, Surprise! You're Engaged, he needs original ideas.  So send those ideas to his Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/Jordan.Gray3?ref=ts

And that's ur RoMANtic Redemption, until next time....LOVE is in the AIR, so TAKE IT IN!!!

HACKERS INVADE my Love Life!!!

OMG!!! Okay, so I'm so sorry I haven't written anything in about a week or so but WOW have I got an update ...

Quick recap: My love life - not so roMANtic these days. My S.O. and I aren't as close as we use to be; an attraction developed between me and a CCG (church camp guy); I'm confused and conflicted. And that's where the story picks up ...

So ... about a week ago I was chatting with the CCG on Facebook when all of a sudden I was booted off my own page. I figured, okay I took too long and my session timed out, right? WRONG. Someone had hacked into my facebook, booted me off and started chatting with the CCG. The convo with the CCG and the "HACKER" went something like this:

CCG: so what time do you want to meet up tomorrow

Hacker: I don't. You have to leave me alone. You should have left the second I told you I had a S.O. I hope you understand. I'm just really confused.

CCG: What? Are you kidding me?

Hacker: No. Please leave me alone

I couldn't believe what I was reading. Right away I figured my S.O. was the "hacker" and somehow he found out my password to Facebook and tried to run off the CCG. (Guys, don't do that, honestly. You just end up looking like a jerk to your woman.) I thought for sure it was the S.O. because I never once received a single friend request, message or comment from the CCG. CCG would tell me each time he sent one and I'd never get it. Also, it would never show up in my email alerts. So what did that tell me??? You guessed it, the hacker knew my email password!

Right away I went from pissed off at my S.O. to scared, to helpless, to an all out cry fest. It honestly felt like someone was watching every move I made. I tried to change my passwords to everything that night, but the hacker would change them back. He/she was truly watching my every keystroke.

At one point in the night I was chatting with myself on Facebook! Yea, you see I have both a personal page (Kimberly Torres) and a business page (K.T. Lynn) well K.T. Lynn popped up on my Kimberly page and started a convo! That was freaky! I nearly threw my laptop across the apartment.

This all happen on a Tuesday, I didn't get back online until the following Tuesday. I found out it wasn't my S.O. though all signs pointed to him, it was just someone who put a "Trojan" virus on my computer that allowed he/she to see my every password change and keystroke. WATCH OUT!!!

On the bright side: I have a hacker following! haha!!! At least they're reading this blog and my roMANtic redemption.

That's today's roMANtic redemption, until next time ...

Men vs. Women - Who proposes??

Hey Everyone!
Here's a little food for thought ... when it come to the proposal, can either sex do the bended knee act??? That's the focus of the latest blog entry on http://www.chicktalkdallas.com/blog/?p=988. I encourage all to read about it.

Here are my two cents however ... I'm a traditional-modern woman. I enjoy when a man pays for dinner or opens my door; to that end I also feel a woman can take over the "bread-winning" in a household. That's my aim at least. Women should not have to live under the financial thumb of a man. Therefore, would I get down on one knee and ask a man to marry me?? ABSOLUTELY. I see no problem with me doing so.

However, there are a couple of things that most likely would keep a woman from doing that:
1. Uncertainty. It's hard to gauge a man's feelings and "where he's at" in the relationship. I believe that probably why you don't see woman doing the asking. Men, I know you feel the same way about some of us gals.

2. Goes against tradition. I get it. Trust me I get it. Women love being center of attention and to turn that on the man wouldn't be a popular concept. What do I say to that?? Men need to feel special too. They love attention just as much as women.

That's my RoMANtic Redemption...until next time....LOVE IS IN THE AIR, SO TAKE IT IN.

Part 2: To Cheat or NOT to Cheat, that's QUITE A QUESTION ...

First off, thanks to everyone for reading my blog and not being harsh or too harsh with your comments. I absolutely appreciate any and all feedback. Like I've said before, I'm going through a transition period in my life - basically, I"m becoming LESS of an emotional moron and learning to put others' feelings before my own (NOT CHEAT). Remember, this blog is called RoMANtic Redemption, a journey I'm inviting everyone to take with me. That said, let's get on with part 2....

Let me preface this entry with this: I've NOT physically cheated on my S.O. (Significant other) with the CCG (Church camp guy), let's just get that straight. Though in some circles the "Text-ship" I've engaged in may count as a form of cheating, I get it. Baby steps people. Keep in mind that before my current relationship I physically cheated on EVERY boyfriend.

Okay, so like I said at the end of the last entry, I finally 'fessed up to my S.O. about the CCG (Church camp guy). How did I start that convo, like this: "I need your help. I need your prayers. I'm about to reveal a hard truth to you and I just want you to listen and then we can discuss". In a nutshell, I came clean about my true feelings for the CCG, how I did go to lunch with him and how I'm not certain about our relationship now (with my S.O.).

I told my S.O. how since getting back from church and even a little before I'd been feeling "uncertain" about my feelings for him. For some reason I was becoming more agitated and upset at every little thing. However, those feelings aren't what prompted me to look elsewhere, in fact this CCG came out of nowhere. Honestly.

In the year and a half that me and my S.O. have been together, I'd never looked at another man romantically. Sure, I'd appreciate a good looking guy passing by, but never wanted to leave my S.O. for anyone. I found these feelings for the CCG strange and yet divine. In one convo with the CCG, and let me say that I talked to him about all this too, in fact he reads this blog also, however in one of our phone conversations I questioned my feelings towards him. He told me that he'd been praying to God to send him his "special someone" and feels that it's me. In the same breath he told me, "this is happening for one of two reasons, Kimberly, one: I'm just a "speed-bump" or test from God or two: I'm a "change in direction" that God wants you to take".

What do you do with that, right? Well, I did tell my S.O. about that convo and a major verbal fight that I won't get into (some things need to remain private) he agreed to let me go and figure this all out. Of course, when I say "he let me go" that means we we're technicially no longer S.O.s however, we do live together and still "act" like we're together so it's hard to really let go to figure all this out. I just need his and everyone's prayers at this point.

Like I've said, I'm going through a major change and transition in my life - from a girl who liked to play with boys to a woman who's looking for a man. I'm learning how to treat a good man, like my S.O.

As soon as I figure this out you all will know. Please send your prayers and leave comments. (Thank you Chelsea and Jared for your comments)

I leave you with this thought: Sure, it would be easy to "do the right thing" and stay with my S.O. and leave the CCG (church camp guy), but could I? Right now, I think if I did that I'd probably still try to sneak a phone call, meeting or text here and there with the CCG and that solves nothing. Plus, I continue to hurt my S.O. - an incredible, DAMN good-looking guy.

Chelsea, I appreciate yours words about my not being married so now's the time to figure things out before making a major mistake (not to say that my S.O. would be). Your words really resonated with me. I just know that divorce WILL NOT be an option for me so I'm happy to go through all this craziness and actually I believe things will work out as God intended.

That's today's RoMANtic Redemption, until next time....
Don't forget about Surprise! You're Engaged - I plan and videotape wedding proposals so give me a holler. www.SurpriseYouAreEngaged.com

To Cheat or NOT to Cheat that's QUITE A QUESTION ...

So this blog is dedicated to all my readers who keep asking me if my S.O. "read that last blog entry?" Yes he did and here's what happened ....

My blog about church camp and the guy I was attracted to was an absolute shock to my S.O. He didn't read it for a couple of days after posting, but when he did I quickly got a phone call asking "to talk". Wasn't good. He was taken aback, caught off-guard; no I hadn't talked it over with him before I posted. (Note to self, always check with the S.O. before a provacative posting)

Anyhow, we agreed we'd "talk later about things". Later, we did talk things out and basically I smoothed things over saying there was nothing to worry about. Well...there was SOME truth to that.

Here's the thing, at camp I was interested, there was a certain attraction to this guy and I DID tell him that I had a boyfriend (S.O). I then slipped him my biz card in hopes of seeing him at church and maybe even introducing to one of my single friends. That was totally my plan.

Well, when we got back from camp I invited this guy out to lunch, hoping that another friend was going to join us - she didn't. So we went.

----------- Note to the reader: Most folks who regularly read my blog know that I'm completely honest and real with what I write, I don't plan to change that. All I ask is that you don't judge me --------------

At lunch, we talked about camp, past relationships, church, etc. In short, that attraction returned. I ended up telling him about my feelings and how those feelings are causing me to question my current relationship with my S.O. He told me he had the same feelings. Yikes!

We pretty much lefted at that however, in the following days, we started a sort of "Text-ship" and convos started getting a little more intense. We went as far as to talk about wanting to become exclusive which meant me leaving my S.O.

That texting and those feelings made me more or less cold when it came to intimacy (not sex) with my S.O. The other day I finally came clean about this guy to my S.O.... TO BE CONTINUED

That's today RoMANtic Redemption ... Until next time
Don't forget about Surprise! You're Engaged - I plan and videotape wedding proposals

Confessions of a Former Cheater

Recently, I found myself wanting to cheat on my current S.O. I was at camp, away from home and my S.O. and I nearly fell back into my old ways. There was this guy at camp, not nearly at cute as my guy, but I wanted to kiss him and even thought about leaving my S.O. so I could be single again. Can you believe it?!?!?!? Yea, all this at church camp! Are thoughts like these normal?

"Once a cheater, always a cheater", is that always the case? As I've mentioned before, cheating on my old S.O.'s WAS my favorite past-time. It's not like I was a man-eater or anything. Taking a page from a "man's book", I simply grew tired of my former dudes and searched for a way out.

Well, to be completely honest, I think I grew tired of all the hand holding, private kissing, movie watching, romancy-type things. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE kissing boys I just wanted to kiss more than one. : )

My tiredness would creep up right at 3 months of dating. That's when my eye started wandering. Hey, in my defense, I always told the guys about my cheating ways prior to getting exclusive with them. After 3 months, I'd cheat, tell my S.O. the truth about it and let him decide whether or not he wanted to stay with me. Most of the time, the guys stayed with me. Then by the 8 month of dating, I'd finally end it with them; the cheatng slowly became too much. That's been my routine for the last 13 years of my life ... until now.

My current S.O. has capture and secured my attention for a good year and a half. Though I've been tempted, I haven't cheated. Why you ask? Couple reasons: 1. I'm a God fearing woman now 2. My S.O. does too much for me to cheat on him

Anytime I think about kissing another boy or wanting to leave my S.O. I think about all the great things he does for me, the unconditional love he shows me and how damn good lookin he is.

I'm 28 years old and I'm in love - first time ever. I've never felt like this before - leaving this man would devastate me and I'd be hard pressed to find something or someone else who makes me feel this way.

Like tonight, our laptop completely crapped out on us. This laptop holds everything for our business, Surprise! You're Engaged. We broke out our back up laptop - but couldn't find the battery for it. What does he do? Jumps up off the couch, heads to the nearest radio shack buys a whole new battery pack and brings home dinner. "I knew you needed a laptop for work and I didn't want to see you disappointed," was all he said when he got home.

Who would cheat on this man?

That's your RoMANtic Redemption for this week, until next time ...

Get me Engaged before my 10 year reunion!!!!

Hello all,

Sorry it's been a bit since my last blog about me and my S.O., but this one is probably the most important one yet. I need your help. I'm 28 years old and my 10 year high school reunion is around the corner - October. I'm neither married or engaged so, we need your help. Well, actually, my S.O. needs your help. He needs you to send him wedding engagement ideas.



As most of you are aware, I own a business called Surprise! You're Engaged - basically I plan and videotape wedding proposals. So we've seen and heard them all. My S.O. helps me out with this business and thus needs an extra special, creative way to propose to me.


Help him and me and send your ideas to Facebook.com/Jordan.Gray3. We plan to videotape our proposal so the winning idea will be posted and given a huge thanks!!!

Love in this Club - it CAN HAPPEN!!

I met my S.O. IN A CLUB!!! The picture is of our first kiss. How cute, huh? You know how they say you don't go looking for love in a club? Well, that's true, but you become the exception when love finds you there!

Here's the short version: Went to a Dallas club, "Wish" in uptown, with an old, but beautiful, high school girlfriend of mine. This was about a year and half ago. Since then, I have not been back to that club and actually I don't think I've hung out with that same girlfriend of mine (I need to make a phone call to her).

Anyhow, we're sitting in the VIP area and in walks my S.O. I'm telling you guys, it was like a movie. He had the "slow motion walk" and everything going on. He looked good and walked tall. At that moment, and this has never happened before, but my internal voice said, "that's the man I'm going to marry!" Now, there's still hope for that!! We're not engaged at the moment, but I'm hopeful.

He was into me also. How do I know this? Well you know that "flower/picture" guy that walks around the club asking, "I take your picture for $5?", that guy came up to us and my S.O. agreed to pay for the picture on one condition .... I had to kiss him! He is soooo smooth. If he had been one of those one-night-stand type of guys, I'd probably hate myself and this picture today. However, I'm so glad my S.O. paid for this picture because it represents our first kiss. yay!

Another way I knew he was different from all the other guys ... he called the next day! But it wasn't just the next day, he called the next morning. I'm talking, 9a.m. the very next morning. Ladies, that's how you know you found yourself a keeper, when the guy calls you the next day and never stops.

And that's today's RoMANtic Redemption. Until next time ...

No Sex - No Problem

You know, it's a good thing I have Surprise! You're Engaged to keep me busy otherwise I'd probably be going crazy thinking of all the SEX I'm NOT HAVING. That's right after years of pre-marital sex I've stopped. No more promiscuous activities going on here, I've stopped all that.

What happened? To tell you the truth, I went back to church - on my own accord. Well sort of on my own accord, actually the major catalyst was my being laid off in June '08. Six months with no income coming in, depression set in, I wasn't showering, stayed in bed all day and night, I was miserable - that's definitely enough to make anyone go back to church.

Three months prior to my lay off in June, I had met my S.O. (significant other) and bless his heart, he stayed with me through that dark and depressing time. What a man huh? Yea, I think so too.

Anyhow, we both made a commitment to go back to church and become member of Fellowship Church in Grapevine, Texas. That to this day has been the best decision of my life. Since becoming a member, I've stopped lusting after guys, no more trolling the Dallas clubs looking for men and no more sex.

It's funny, but the no more sex thing has actually been a good thing for my relationship with my S.O. What's more? He's totally in agreement of it. And, he's not cheating - promise. So far, it's been nearly a year since we've had any kind of sex and that includes oral.

So what do we attribute our "No Sex policy" to? Our fear of God. You see, our belief is if we engage in sex before marriage, God will punish us and our relationship/marriage. It's definitely been hard, so to speak, especially on birthdays, our anniversary, vacations, trust me we've been tempted. However, we feel if we're strong enough to hold out during this time, that strength will also be exhibited in our marriage.

No sex has also made us a lot more creative when it comes to roMANcing each other. Plus, our senses are much more heightened when we become increasingly "hot for each other". A simple kiss or touch is so much more now - it's a complete turn on.

And that's today's RoMANtic Redemption. Until next time ...

Wedding Proprosals on National TV!!!

Robbins Bros is looking for home video wedding proprosals. They want you to submit yours and they'll air it on a national TV commercial.

Check this out: www.videos.robbinsbros.com/

Sounds great huh? Well only if you have it on tape! That's where I can help. As President/Founder of Surprise! You're Engaged I"m dedicated to commemorating the memory of your wedding engagement. So many times I hear married couples say they wish they had it on tape well now you can. Check out my web site for details and let's get you on TV: www.SurpriseYouAreEngaged.com

Romance Redemption

Hi there,
My name is K.T. Lynn, and I want to take you on a journey. I've started a new chapter in my life and I'm using my new blog to document this path. I invite you along.

Quit little ditty about me: I'm President/Founder of a new website called, Surprise! You're Engaged - basically I videotape wedding proposals and other "couples' videos". The crazy part? I've only fallen in love with "Love" a year and a half ago.

To be honest, prior to starting up my business, Surprise! You're Engaged, 3 months ago, I was NOT a fan of love. Crazy, I know. In fact, I was like Julia Roberts in "My Best Friend's Wedding", I was very uncomfortable with all that "yucky love stuff". Romance weirded me out. I never went on dates where it was just me and the guy, most the time I requested my friends (guys and girls) be in the room or nearby.

Real quick, do me a favor. Take a quick scan of your girlfriends, is there one that acts more like a dude? She's a little flakey, you can never count on her showing up to the club, but when she does she's the life of the party. She charms the boys and breaks their heart. You never hear of her in a relationship lasting more than 3 months and if she is most likely she's cheated on him? Yup, I'm "that girl" or at least I was.

It's kind of a remarkable thing that's happening to me at this point in my life. What's more? I'm well aware of it. I've changed. I'm no longer "that girl"... plus, I'm in love.

Take this journey with me as I try and understand my past and how it affects my future. My hope is that I come to a realization about my current "change of heart", falling in love and possibly get a ring on my finger - never thought I'd want that.

Until next time, this is K.T. Lynn and RoMANtic Redemption.